Hey kids, it's your mom

I just wrote a whole paragraph of crap about how un-fantastic my life is, but then I was like "No, screw that. I'm gonna be happy because I want to. gosh dang it!" and then I backspaced it all.

so here's so random stuff that's on my brain 

I've always wanted to write a letter to my future kids, so here ya go.

Hey kiddos, it's your friendly neighborhood spider-man. jk it's your mom. but like your mom wayyyyyy back when, specifically the year 2017. so that mean's i'm 19 about to turn 20. Also it's August 14th and it's 12:58am and i'm sitting in my cousin's bedroom in California, just in case you were wondering.  
Some quick instructions:
1. you gotta be sitting in your bed when you are reading this, bc why not
2. Google "The National Parks" and listen to the "Until I Live" album, because it's the best and because I'm listening to it as I write this and I want to share the beauty of this band with you. 

3. Think of the happiest memory, you've had up until this point. Think about the people you were with. Think about how you felt in that moment. Now take a minute to pray and thank Heavenly Father for what you were given, trust me it'll be a blessing, 

4. Last step: remember that I love you.

Hey guy's or girl's.. I'm not quite sure what to address you as. we will just stick with kiddos. and yes I do mean the plural form because I plan on having more that one, but if I don't hey only child, you're my fave :) but if I do end up with more, then you all are my favorite. jokes, I probably have a favorite, but you will never know who it is, so just keep being the nice, friendly, not menacing kids that I hope I raised. oh gosh, I wonder what kind of mom I ended up as. Just to let you know I really want to be a great mom and I hope I am able to be that for you. I know I'm only 19 and you don't exist, but know that I am doing everything that I can to make sure I am on the right path for you guys. 

If you're reading this, then that means I didn't majorly screw up and you are literate (yay me) 

so listen up (trust me I know that this is written down and that you can't actually listen to this, but I couldn't think of another phrase that would work.. okay wait maybe "pay attention" could work, but oh well we are past that)  I'm gonna give you some super "mom-ish' advice. Say your prayers, i'm being serious. I didn't start until a couple of months ago, but it really does help. Trust that the Lord knows what's up and will be there to comfort you. Don't be afraid to ask for blessings. Those are some magical tools that helped me through a low point in during my 4th semester (shout out to worthy priesthood holders, you know who you are).  Allow yourself to be vulnerable. Allow yourself to be loved. Enjoy the small moment. ride with the windows down, blasting music. Surround yourself with the people that make you a better person. Love the people around you. Know that the hard moments aren't forever. Most importantly, know that I Love You with all of my heart. I don't know who you are, I don't know what your names will be, I don't know what your cute little faces will look like, but I do know that I love you right now. You guys are a joy to think about. just know that I'm waiting for the day I get to be your cool, totally uncool, weirdly strange, majorly uncoordinated mom.

with love, 

Alexandra Elissa Escobar

P.s. If you haven't already, listen to "You Are Gold" by The National Parks